Good Lesson Plans

Hi again,

Melissa and I have been teaching oral English in China for almost an entire school year, and we've come to realize what works in the Chinese classroom and what doesn't work in the Chinese classroom. Actually, it's more of what's the easiest to do in the Chinese classroom... We're lazy!

We received a few weeks of training right before we joined our school last summer. In this training, they told us to divide the class into small groups for something called 'student-centered learning.' This didn't really work for a few reasons...

First off, to be able to accomplish this on a continual basis, we need complete control over our students, which is nearly impossible because a lot of them honestly don't even understand the words that are coming out of our mouths. Secondly, we are not regarded as real teachers by the students because we are not able to give them grades that count. Some students regularly sleep, read magazines, play games, listen to music, talk and generally goof off during our classes all because we don't grade them. We have to discipline them more than any other teacher, but we have the least sway in getting them in any real trouble. If we did decide to grade them, it would only be in the hopes of getting them to take our classes more seriously, and that's a gamble that we don't really want to try due to the fact that we would each have to grade over 700 students. This brings me to my third point, which is that there are over sixty students in each of our classes, so if we want to get them into any group activity, it's a lot of work. This means that we have to make sure the students are actually working (most of them are not), and we have to explain the instructions many times. Lastly, we've found that asking our students to be creative tends to be a headache. Having them 'imagine' anything in a group is a terrible idea because it's not only difficult to explain to the students, but it's also disappointing to hear their unoriginal ideas after all of the help we gave to them.

Okay, so you've heard about what doesn't work. Now, you will hear about what does work for the lazy oral English teacher. First and foremost, competitions are always a plus if they are accessible enough for even the slowest students. Competitions grip our students' attention almost as much as Kung Fu Panda! However, we need to go into the classroom with a lot of energy at first to get them to pay attention to the rules. After that, the hard work is generally over!

Secondly, games that involve the entire class are usually a good idea if the game is easy enough. The students' abilities vary wildly in each class, so we find it best to keep the game simple. When the entire class is involved (or is split into two or three teams), certain students are less shy about speaking. When we involve the entire class, we get the opportunity to force the weakest speakers to participate, who would be overshadowed by the stronger speakers during group-based activities. Most importantly, however, is that games that involve the entire class force our students' attention on us, rather than on their peers. It's much easier to manage a class that is focused in a single direction, rather than a class that is focused in twelve different directions.

We're thinking about posting some of the lesson plans that have worked in the past on this blog in the hopes that they may help someone, but Blogger is blocked in China, so that may have to wait.

What can I say? We're lazy!

Rongjiawan Remembers the Sichuan Earthquake

As you probably know, an earthquake hit Sichuan province on May 12, 2008, killing over 69,000 people. One year later, all of China remembered this event by organizing a moment of silence at 2:28pm, the exact time that the earthquake began. The reaction to this anniversary at our school, however, was the complete opposite of silence.

The day before the anniversary, a couple of firetrucks rode into school with their sirens blaring. This sound accompanied a cacophony of other loud noises, such as an air-raid siren and the clamor of excited students. It was like some sort of crazy fire drill on steroids! I thought this event noteworthy enough to brave the summery heat and snap a few long-distance shots. Despite this, we later learned that this was simply the practice-run for a real emergency evacuation drill.

Two days later, the school was buzzing with anticipation of the drill. I was extra-excited because I learned that all afternoon classes were cancelled (and I hate one of those classes). Our teacher friends told us to stand outside so we could be there for the beginning of the exercise, but since we're lazy we went back to our apartment instead. All of a sudden, the air-raid siren started blaring once again, which we took to be our cue to go outside, and this is what we saw:

Pretty crazy, right? The recordings are a little bit awkward because the audio picked up all of our banter, but do your best to ignore that. The students flooded out of their classrooms for a long time, even after the video ends. Next, the firetrucks arrived at the scene to set up their hoses:

And this is what happened:

Remember the students trapped at the top of the school? Well, here they are:

And, finally, our hero makes a dramatic descent down the side of the building:

The fire department then decided to demonstrate how to use a fire extinguisher by putting out a bunch of fresh trashcan fires.

I kinda wish they would do that a little bit more often... I feel like trash fires are everywhere, everyday, constantly stinking me in the face! I mean, people around here get rid of trash by setting it on fire! You'd think that the RJWFD would be busy all the time, yet I never see them! Well, after the drill, I realized that Melissa and I were something of a side performance. I should've known!

We were asked by a Hunan television camera crew to give them our impressions of the emergency drill. As you can see from the picture I looked GREAT. And I told them I didn't need any time to prepare any remarks. So I rambled and rambled about how totally wicked awesome the emergency drill was until I knew that if I said anything further, it could only make me look worse. Ahem. Then they interviewed Melissa (she declined to be pictured here), who eloquently restated what I was trying to say. She ended up giving our liaison a little bit more ammunition for the Chinese translation.

All in all, t'was an exciting day.

Cullen

The Mystery of the Missing Bucket

Melissa and I got back from a weekend trip to Wuhan late at night this past Sunday. When we got to the staircase that leads solely to our two apartments, we found the gate ajar. Melissa got freaked out because she clearly remembers locking the gate before leaving (the barber actually mimed that she should do this). What was even more strange was that the floors of the staircase were cleaned of the usual filth, and our trash bucket, which was located outside our door, was missing! Somebody took our trash bucket! We opened the door to our apartment and found that all of our possessions were still intact, which was a great relief. The mystery of missing bucket would have to wait until Monday.

We didn't find any leads during day, but come nightfall, the plot thickened. Melissa and I were getting ready for bed, when we heard footsteps coming up the stairs. The pit-pats came to our door and continued up the stairs. When they got to the apartment above us, we heard the door open and then footsteps above us inside the third floor apartment.

Melissa and I have the only sets of keys to the above apartment. It is supposed to be available to the second volunteer foreign teacher. However, we live together in the second floor apartment because we like seeing each other a lot. This means that the third floor apartment is supposed to be vacant. Ever since the beginning of school, I have been going up to that apartment at night to check out any weird noise because I had this craving to catch somebody trying to live there. When this happened, I was itching to go up there to catch the burglar in action. Melissa even came with me because the noises were so distinct!

We ascended the stairs, unlocked the door and pulled it open. Standing before us was an older Chinese woman trying to explain something to us. Melissa asked, "Do you live here?" in Chinese, and she replied, "Yes." I didn't understand any of this, so I walked in a little further to see what was going on. I looked into the study and found it converted into a bedroom. But what was in the bed was the real shocker. A man under the sheets slowly turned over and peered at me, and I recognized him as Headmaster Li!

I apologized to both of them, as it seemed that I had disturbed the Headmaster's slumber. Totally confused doesn't even begin to describe our state as we went back into our apartment. Before going to sleep, we called our liaison, and she promised to ask around about what might be happening. Needless to say, we were agitated.

She called back today telling us that the Headmaster's apartment, which is right below ours on the first floor, is too wet. So, he decided that he would move to the much drier third floor apartment without telling us. Now, this inconveniences us because we have English Corner up there every Tuesday at 5:15pm. He promised to find us a room for English Corner, but we've heard that promise before. Our plan is to not tell anyone to avoid the third floor apartment. The students will probably go up there later today, knock on the door and be met by a confused Headmaster!

So, what ever happened to the bucket that so mysteriously disappeared? As of now, I can only speculate that it now resides in some crappy janitor's closet after being used to clean the floors of the staircase. What a terrible fate for our beloved trash bucket!

Cullen

Rongjiawan Has Fighter Jets?

During the past few weeks in Rongjiawan, I started noticing some airplane noises in the middle of the day. Now, this is a little strange due to the fact that the RJW skies were conspicuously free of air traffic before Chinese New Year. 

Just a few minutes ago, I heard the airplane noise again, and I looked out the window. I saw something grey and very fast streak across the sky. I could tell this was uncommon, as all the students playing in the field were gawking at it as well. When the sound almost disappeared, it started to get louder again, and I looked outside for a second time. To my amazement, the airplane came around for a second pass, as if it were circling the school! In all, it circled the school five times, which allowed me to take the above photo and the below video:

Our little Rongjiawan is growing up so fast! *tears*

Cullen

Don' Be Afeared Tah Cahmmint!

The other day, Melissa and I finished our last classes and met up to walk the short distance back to our apartment, high-fiving the entire way...

As we neared our staircase, the barber moseyed on out of his barbershop with the incredible timing of a hawk intercepting its prey! He said, "deh deh!" or something like that, and he swiftly patted my junk again! As he did it, he had a sly smile on his face, so the gears in my noggin started to crank out a new idea... Just to test it out, I feigned like I would swat at his nuts, and he clenched up into a defensive position! We exchanged laughs and went about our business.

Later that day, the barber came up and knocked on our door to get the third floor apartment's key from us (he uses the washing machine up there, especially when it's cold out). I gave him the key, and he thanked me with a, "day day!" and a broad smile on his face. Suddenly, he went for a swat at my nuts, but I was quick to block his attempt. I followed up with a swat of my own, which he blocked with great ease. A stalemate!

So, I suppose that it's all just a big game that he plays with his friends (at least I hope so!), and I'm in on it. What have I learned? I'll try not to take things so seriously, and I'll always be on my guard around the barber!

Cullen

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Class This Morning...

Today began like any other day... I let the alarm snooze for twenty minutes, bitterly showered and left for my morning class. As I descended the staircase to the basketball courts, I was met by the smiling face of the barber. He was folding his freshly-washed towels, when I noticed that his gaze had drifted to a spot away from my face. At first, I thought he was staring at the teddy bear that I had in my hands, which would make sense because today is the first day that I used the teddy bear as a teaching prop. But no. As I attempted to move outside of his reach, he beckoned me over for a morning handshake (just what I wanted to avoid) with a more-excited-than-usual air about him. He then grabbed my hand in way that suggested a handshake, but acted as a restraint and firmly planted his other hand on my - ahem. Oh, and he didn't even miss a little bit. It's like he had been finely-tuning his aim for this moment or something. Stunned, I gave a pathetic, little chuckle and shuffled off to class.

Apparently I'm not the first victim of his groping, as I learned that this had happened to last year's male volunteer as well. To be clear, it wasn't a grab, but was more of a pat, like he meant to tell me that he sees me through my pants or something. I don't really know why he decided to do this, but if his goal was to make me feel self-conscious right before getting up in front of sixty-five fourteen year olds, then bravo.

Cullen

New Year's Day Parties Galore!

Apparently, New Year's Day is the time to party here, not New Year's Eve, so last night Cullen and I split up and visited various classrooms to observe and take part in class parties. I brought along my camera, and in the above photo you'll see one of my classes about to get down to some karaoke! The students really put a lot of effort into decorating the room, which is basically where they live anyway, so it would make sense!

The boys standing in the middle of the room were really into the song, and I have to say this class' boys are actually really into my lessons, too, which is more than I can say for most of my classes! Next I went to another one of my favorite (yes, I play favorites) classes and walked in on the middle of a Congo Line! This kid played the broom for us while we danced.

I stayed in the line for as long as my endurance would last me, and just as they were mobbing me to sing a song or "put on a show" for them, this adorable girl, the daughter of their math teacher, stepped up and danced the Cha Cha!





She's precious, I know. I managed to sneak away from this classroom and found my way to a few more. All the classes demanded that I sing a song, but I'm no one's monkey and stood my ground. My trip to the next class, coincided with the Cha Cha tour, so here's another video of the lovely dance, this time synchronized with pink jacket girl's sister, red jacket girl, because you loved the first one so much!





Such passion! Such grace. Here are a few more photos of the night, and then that's it for a month during our tour of Southeast Asia!

Teachers' Sports Days

Pain, endurance, strength, speed, embarrassment... Teachers' Sports Days is a grueling competition of massive proportions. Hundreds of the most highly-trained teachers hailing from all ends of the school's campus fight for victory over the course of at least two days.

Melissa competed in the 50 meter basketball carry, and made a truly historic effort. Despite the PE teacher's many deliberate false starts, Melissa's spirit remained firm. It seemed, however, that the Olympian gods on high had other plans for her. In the end, she did not win. Perhaps the gods were keeping Melissa humble?

A day later was my event; the relay race. This ancient and beautiful race was made more grand by the ferocity of the competition. However, I came prepared for victory! Among my equipment was the mythical running shoes from the god Adidas. The powerful shoes were almost too swift for me to handle, but I quickly regained my balance. My opposition ate my dust!

Cullen

Happy Belated Halloween!

Hi all,

Melissa and I have successfully eaten our way through many kilos of chocolate, thus signifying the end to the Halloween season. We may have gained a few pant sizes, but we installed a plan to even everything out. You see, we shared the sugar rush with our students by making candy a part of our lessons. So, the students are now that much fatter, thus negating our relative augmentation. Yahoo!

Seriously though, we did feed our students candy last week. I know what you're thinking. You're probably thinking, 'These kids must need bribes to talk because you're such a bad teacher!' Well, you know what? You know what? Yeah? So???

Actually, it wasn't so easy for the students to get the candy. In order to receive candy, they had to:
a) Sit through a lengthy vocabulary presentation on Halloween-related things,
b) Watch the first five minutes of The Nightmare Before Christmas (you know, the part where they sing 'This is Halloween'?),
c) Stay awake as I read them 'The Yellow Ribbon' (a scary story)
d) Rack their brains and write a scary story, and
e) Tell their scary story to the class.

Most of the kids got into it, which was good to see. One of Melissa's students told a good scary story, which I will paraphrase here:

"There once was a little boy who could only say the word thirteen. His parents tried everything to get him to say anything else, but their child could only say, "thirteen, thirteen, thirteen..." They finally tried a psychiatrist, who dedicated much of his time with this interesting case. They worked together in his office, at a local playground and at a park. They had been working together for many months now, and the child could say nothing but the word thirteen. They took a seat by an old well in the park, and the man again said to the boy, "Why do you only say thirteen?" As an answer, the boy pushed him down the well. The boy watched the man hit the bottom of the well and said, "fourteen, fourteen, fourteen..."

After all of this Halloween goodness, we are rearing our heads over Alaska, as we prepare for America to once again disappoint us. I sent in my New Jersey absentee ballot about eight days ago in Yueyang. At least I know that I did everything that I possibly could have done to discontinue the Bush White House's policies. Melissa, on the other hand, did not even apply for an absentee ballot from her battleground state, Ohio. For shame.

Our fingers are crossed!

Celebrating 30 Years of Existence: Yueyang County No. 1 Middle School

October 3rd was our school's thirtieth anniversary, and to celebrate, the administration decked the entire school out in lots of red ornamentation. I don't know who these girls are in the above photo, but I think that both of us felt bad for them. Their job was to greet cars that came in through the school's main gate. Whoopee! (Side note: all of these photos were taken on October 2nd. We took a vacation from October 3rd - October 6th. So, we missed the October 3rd celebrations.)

Melissa is standing in front of the administration building, which is the first building you see when entering the campus. In the days leading up to the anniversary, there were Chinese announcements over the school's intercom system that told everyone of last minute changes to their class schedules. Two of my classes that week were cancelled without my knowing it. So, I showed up to class and looked like an idiot by trying to start a lesson while the students tried to tell me that class was cancelled. Overall, I was more surprised than upset in leaving the classes. 

Awkward! When Melissa and I came back from shopping, who did we find lining the only route to our apartment, but our loyal Senior 1 students. I said 'hi, hello, etc.' while walking, and Melissa got the brilliant idea of giving everyone high fives. Her hand hurt pretty bad after that.

The above photo is the new gym that the administration constructed for this occasion, which happens to be right outside of our apartment. I've heard a few people around campus say that this gym is a huge waste of money, as it is only a symbol of power, rather than a practical addition to the campus. In any case, the students were excited to be out of class for the celebration that marked the beginning of their first real break from school, but not as excited as us!

Cullen

Leading Our Children... Into the Future!

This lovely Soviet-style, futurist-looking statue greets visitors to our school's humble library (we have yet to see an actual book in there). For the first month, I just kind of just glanced at it in passing, wondering, "What the eff?" every time. That is, until I recently took a closer look at it...

As you can see from the closer-up view of the statue, the teacher and student are riding an iron wave. This is obviously symbolic of their ultimate goal of smelting the seas. Do you see the rather large atom? The teacher has it dangerously placed in her hand, and holds it like a carrot in front of her student. But look again! The first picture makes its meaning clearer: the students here grab at 'the atom' clumsily, like an infant trying to catch a baseball. If I were a student here, I would not be amused by the administration's poorly veiled lack of faith in the student body's abilities.

Or, would I be too busy looking up the statue's skirt? Artsy...

Cullen

Happenings Around Campus: Mid-Morning Exercise

Above is a video of the mid-morning exercises that our students perform every single day. Can you see the dedication, the blood, sweat and tears that every student pours into this routine? I mean, just look at the excitement!

This is only the tip of the iceberg, as they also wake up every single day at 6:00 am to do an elaborate early-morning exercise routine. Melissa and I have been too bitter towards the blaring music to go out there and check out the show, but judging by the sounds of it, I'm sure it is phenomenal.

Cullen

Update: When I try to click on the video, it says that it is currently not available. Does anybody else get this message, or does it work okay?

Atteeeeeeeention!

So, for the first week before school started, the students at Yueyang County No. 1 Middle School had military training. The students got ordered around by military officers and marched all over school. It's every little kid's dream come true!

Cullen

Welcome to Rong Jai Won!

On the 20th, Melissa and I were swept off to Rong Jai Won by Rock Long, our Chinese liaison, and Erin Chen, the daughter of a teacher at Yueyang County No. 1 Middle School (which is where we now work). Rock (she said that she wanted a name that is strong, and a rock is indeed strong) is exceptionally helpful and fun. Sidetrack: Chinese English speakers make up their 'first' names, and most of the time, they don't even choose actual names. The other day we met an English teacher who we thought was named 'Chris'. We later had dinner with him and he had to openly correct me. It turns out that his name is 'Praise'.

Back on course: Erin (far right) will be leaving for university soon, so she has been marginally helping us. So, the burden of being our guide rests on Rock's (middle) sturdy shoulders, but she is getting some help from her boyfriend, William Long (not related to Rock). More about them later (I have no pictures to support my rantings!). Our first day in Rong Jai Won (RJW) consisted of Melissa and me cleaning the apartment and settling in a little bit. On the second day, Rock and Erin took us into town to show us some of the shops.

We shopped around the various lighting stores (successfully haggled!) and the bedding stores (too expensive! - tai gue le!). Then they took us to the Open Market, which is like a cross between a farm stand and a flea market. The Open Market resides in the center of RJW, and provides a lot of interesting sights.

The above shot is of the various vegetables on sale at just one of the many stands in the market. Notice the various hot peppers in the foreground. Believe me when I say that hot peppers are everywhere in Hunan and they are used in almost every dish. Hunanese food is not for the mild palatted. There were other sights that I dared not take pictures of, mostly out of courtesy. These sights were tubs of eels and fish (both alive and dead), full nets of large, jumping frogs, and cages of live rabbits and ducks. Melissa and I feel sad to see these animals on death row. Then again, I think of the various animals we have eaten (I've eaten frogs, eels and ducks, and Melissa has eaten all the above including pig intestines), and I realize that we are consumers of this sadness. That's deep, for reals.

Anyhoot, we grabbed a bunch of ingredients and brought them back for our first home-cooked meal! Yahooooooo! Actually, it was Rock and William who did all of the cooking, and I observed them from afar (and ate Oreos, which are nearing extinction in China thanks to me and Melissa).

Now, the Chinese love their MSG, and I must admit that it tastes absolutely delicious. However, our apartment is a No-MSG Zone. We don't want it, so don't bring it. The stuff being poured into the wok is good old salt and lots of it! Actually, that dish being prepared by Rock is hot peppers with pork. Notice I didn't say pork with hot peppers. One thing I learned about cooking hot peppers is that you should stand back or the hot pepper fumes will make you.

Pictured above is our authentic Hunanese meal, as prepared by Rock and William in our very own kitchen! It was pretty derrrn good, and I have been cooking with their techniques since.

Cullen